I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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