Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
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