Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Randomize
