i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize