I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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