everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
