Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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