And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
