I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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