so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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