I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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