Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
