I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
