even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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