Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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