if you like me you must not know who I am
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
