I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
