Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
