actually, I'm a sock model
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
