STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
You need a sexual gate keeper
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
