you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
