I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
