...so i touched it.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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