ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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