he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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