Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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