Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
