As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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