So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
