It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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