Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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