So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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