I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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