I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize