Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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