So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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