I'm pants shitting drunk right now
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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