she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
