I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
