My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
