I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Randomize