You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize
