How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
