I showed him my bush... on skype.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
