I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
two words...techno handjob
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
