I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Who died my cat blue again?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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