the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
