I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
