It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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