Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
