i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
