And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
